Confession: I hate Christmas music.
And I really, really hate the stations that feel like it is appropriate to play non-stop Christmas music from Halloween till Christmas. This is just not okay people. Not okay.
I’d rather come to the end of my days by choking on a candy cane than listen to that junk for two months straight. This year, I have intentionally boycotted the listening of any station that insists on playing stupid Christmas songs 24-freaking-7. But, really, I am glad Jesus was born.
And if you are one of those people who can not wait until the radio stations start playing Christmas music all. day. long. then you and I need to seriously re-evaluate our friendship. I may even have to de-friend you on Facebook. Yes. It is that serious.
In my easily irritated opinion, these are the top five most overplayed, most annoying Christmas songs of all time:
#5 All I want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth. Ok, the little lisp is endearing, but the song is just straight annoying.
#4 The 12 Days of Christmas. All versions make me want to grind my teeth, but the redneck version is the WORST. Just the sheer fact that wrasslin’ tickets and Copenhagen are mentioned together in a song about Christmas makes it not okay.
#3 I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas. Who really wants a hippopotamus for Christmas? Could we not be a little more practical than that?
#2 Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer. Well maybe grandma shouldn’t have been drinking so much eggnog. Just saying.
And the number one most annoying Christmas song of all time is…..
…. wait for it…..
……you totally know what’s coming……
…..I know you’re thinking it too…..
The Christmas Shoes.
That song is just not okay. Don’t nobody need a pair of Christmas shoes. And don’t nobody want to hear a cheesy song about any Christmas shoes. The world would be a better place if that song had never been introduced to our lives.
Again, if you are reading this and disagree with me regarding the quality of this song, our friendship is liable to be ending in the very near future. It is just a matter of time until we realize that we don’t see alike on this issue, nor on many other important life topics.
I have a long-standing tradition of not being into Santa, or Elf on the shelf, birthday parties for Jesus, caroling, or shopping for gifts. Go ahead and call me a grinch. I willingly accept the title. If loving Christmas means loving those things, well, you can just count me out on Christmas spirit. I desperately desire for all of those things to fall into a deep, dark ice cave in the North Pole and never resurface.
However, two years ago I developed a love for Christmas that I never thought possible as I walked through rural, Muslim, Africa in mid-December and realized that for them no such thing as Christmas even exists. How can Christmas exist in a place where the people have never heard of Jesus the Messiah?
The only Christmas season that year was the one I made. And that is when I became a fan, for the first time, of Christmas music. Oh, I still hate that stupid “Christmas Shoes” song and all songs about Santa Clause and reindeer. I just can’t do it. But, I found that year that I absolutely love singing Christmas songs as a celebration of the birth of my Savior.
That is the meaning of Christmas isn’t it? Jesus. The birth of a Savior come to save the world from its sins.